Our next theme will be ROPE. Contact jester about submitting…
The Jester is featured along with other Columbia University comedy groups (The Fed, Fruit Paunch, Chowdah, and Alfred) in The Eye. Read the article here.
Ad Reinhardt’s May 1932 Jester cover.
Check out a recent article in Columbia Magazine, showing early Jester covers.
They’re soooo beautiful.
New Theme: +/-
Think of ideas!
Recently, the Columbia Spectator, Columbia University’s Newspaper, held auditions to become an Opinion Columnist. Naturally, the Jester wanted to express some of its many opinions. Documentation of this audition can be found below: the application itself as well as the questionably-expected rejection letter.
The Spec
1. Name
[Jester of Columbia]
2. Where did you hear about the columnist application?
The internet.
3. What do you want your beat, or area of focus, to be? What makes you qualified to cover it, and why is it important for the Spec to cover it? In other words, why should readers be interested in what you’re saying, and why should you be the one to say it?
I’d like to write a two word column. I would like to declare that something is unsatisfactory in the form: “_____ sucks.” As Editor-in-Chief of the Jester of Columbia, I feel quite qualified to discern the difference between what rules and what sucks. Please note that this column will not be expanded to denoting something as ruling and another as sucking. I chose only to focus on a half-empty glass. Students will be interested in my column because the name of the column will be significantly longer than its content. In this modern Internet Age, in which attention spans thin into an infinitesimal sliver, I believe that the amount of time one can successfully hold an audience’s attention is two to four words - five words, maybe if one of them is “vagina.” This column guarantees to be controversial. No one agrees upon suction.
We at the Jester find it amusing that there’s a fourth installment to the Fast and the Furious series coming out called Fast & Furious, which is basically a recycled version of the first title.
This means the series will be comprised of The Fast and the Furious, 2 Fast 2 Furious, The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift, and Fast & Furious.
And so, we came up with some more possible titles. Enjoy.
- Thrice Fast and Three Times as Furious
- The Faster and the More Furious
- The Fastest and the Most Furiousest
- The Fast and the Furious: Now With 25% More Fury
- Ever Faster But Not Quite as Furious
- The Fast and the Furious: School Dayz
- The Fast and the Spurious
- The Fast and the Fantastic Four
- Untitled Vin Diesel Project (2010)
- 2 Legit 2 Quit read more…
Here’s a list we compiled of things that cannot be bought in bulk.
We know. We’ve tried.
- Bones
- Spare testicles (anymore)
- Asian Slaves (anymore)
- African slaves (anymore)
- Highlanders
- Small children (often used to make meth)
- Meth (often used to make meth)
- Pigeons
- Blood
- Viagra, apparently
- The Incredible Hulk
- Love
- Gonorrhea
- Tattoos
- Mail Order Brides
Another list…
- Unusual Programming Languages
- Objectivist-C
- Rongorongo BASIC
- Ruby on ‘Roids
- Gentleman’s C
- Java Shiv
- Perl Necklace
- Puuuuurrrl
- Hypertext Marxist Language (The People’s Republic of HTML)
- Extensible Marxist Language (The Democratic People’s Republic of HTML)
- Lithp
- Trouser Python
- Pith-on
- Pith-off
- R.KLLY Pith-on-U
- SQLGBT
- Chinese
- read more…
As a tribute to David Foster Wallace, held a sketch show in Fall 2008. Our thanks to Alfred, Chowdah, and members of CUSwing for helping out. Here are some videos of that show.
The Death of Everyone But the Salesman
And, like a jazz album reissue, we offer you an alternate take of:
Sports Illustrated Football Phone Not Included
Help support the Jester and combat your depression. Buy a 2009-2010 subscription to receive the next FOUR (4) issues of the Jester of Columbia. We’ll also include a feeling of hope.
Also, remember to become a FAN on facebook to receive Jester Updates and a new friend.
