The new Jester is out, available at your nearest I don’t know where they are but maybe you’ll find one

But more importantly, since this is a blog post written by someone who might be a first year, do forgive me for making LitHum jokes. Maybe if you wait a year you’ll get CC Jokes.

The Inferno, as envisioned by a Puppy

One Maundy Thursday, Dante the Baby Dachshund was walking to the dog run, when suddenly, a German Shepherd, a Siberian Husky, and a Pit Bull hopped out from behind a tree. “GRRRRRR,” they said.

Dante turned around and peed on a bush. From behind the bush emerged a beagle named Virgil. “Woof,” He said.

“Woof,” said Dante

The two turned around and saw the other dog run. “Lasciate ogni speranza, voi chi entrate. Please clean up after your dog.”

“Woof,” said Virgil.

The two walked in. They passed some airedales being stung by bees and a bunch of very regal looking Golden Retrievers. Dante played tug of war with them for a while. He grew bored of this and kept walking. They passed a couple of Chihuahuas who were blowing about in the wind, and then they passed some really fat Yellow Labs. There was a Rottweiler with a really big bowl of food and a really skinny Greyhound. Next to them, a Jack Russell was barking at a really sad looking Bloodhound.

They crossed into the inner part of the dog run with all of the naughty antisocial dogs. There were Pit Bulls fighting each other, a Pit Bull scratching itself, and a baby Pit Bull gnawing on a squeaky Jesus doll. There were two Shih Tzus Copulating, a Shiba Inu peeing on itself, a Shar Pei barking very loudly, and a Puli with a pile of other dogs toys he had taken in exchange for treats. There was a dog meowing, a dog with a ball that was not his, one barking at other dogs, and a pug who would throw his toys at groups of dogs to make them fight.

Worst of all, there were a bunch of poodles who are currently substituting for the sins I was not creative enough to illustrate with dogs.

Dante saw a dog that kind of looked like Lucifer. He peed on him and then Virgil and he exited the dog run through the back exit.

“Woof,” said Dante.

“Woof,” said Virgil.